basket case

That's me, that's what I have been for the last few days. One second I am wicked nervous and positive that this didn't work. The next I was wicked excited and just 'knew' I was pregnant. I have been driving hubby NUTS. I was freakin' out last night. I didn't even want to go to bed, I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep.

I woke up this morning as positive as I could be. I was even in the shower singing about how I was going to find out I was pregnant today. Yeah, I know, I'm a dork!
I headed over to the office and got mad because I couldn't find a parking spot right up front. I mean come one people, I just want to run in give my blood and go! Well I got in and the place was packed, I mean like I was gong to have to sit next to someone in the waiting room, if not two people. UGH, just let me get this over. I sign in, as soon as I look up I see them, my wonderful nurses. They wave me over. I'm like phew, I don't have to sit next to the woman with the little one in her arms.
I mean come on people, DON'T bring your children to the Fertility Center to wait for you?!!! Effin' idiots, like we don't feel like shite already!!
Anyhow, I go over smiling and they immediately accuse me of cheating. Cheating being that I took a home pregnancy test and already know my results. No ladies, I promise you I didn't cheat. They laughed, yeah right. I said I swear, I did not cheat. I so wanted to, but I didn't. They ask me how I feel. I tell them one second this the other that. They ask how does my belly feel, I say heavy, bloated, extremely bloated. they say, that's good. The ask how do my boobs feel, I say aha, that's the thing they don't feel any different. They say, that's ok, you have a positive attitude, that means you will have a positive test. Blood is taken by, we'll call her The Bearer of Great News. TBGN tells me that she will have so and so rub it on her belly before she takes it back. Pregnant bellies are good luck, did you know it? Specially for those of us struggling, doesn't quite make sense, I sure don't want to be around pregnant people. Well, I do now. Oh well. She also says that if she gets the results early... see I call back at 1 and they tell me the results. Oh the agony!...she will call me and let me know.

I get to work and realize that I am the only one there in the morning, I can't exactly freak out when she calls to tell me. And, I will shirley freak out, no matter what the heck she says to me. I text message her and tell her not to call me because I will not be able to react properly and it'll make for worse. Then hubby calls. He's like Soooo. Kinda like he did you get the results yet. Knowing full well, I don't get those until 1. He's says, just kidding and asks how it went. I go into the story of how they accused me of cheating and how we all laughed and what they thought, blah, blah, blah. Then my other line rings and I see it's Dr. so and so's office. I'm like shite, the doctor's office is calling. He's like go answer it. I'm like, I don't want to. I just freakin' left there not even an hour ago. how do they have the results already. OMG. So, I answer it. TBGN says "lowercasek, its TBGN...and the rest was a blur. I just remember her saying something along the lines of it looks good. Your test was positive and the numbers look great you are over 100. I'm in hysterics, I'm crying, I'm laughing. I'm like are you sure that was mine? Are you sure, really? No way? Really?! really?! Holy Crap! that's all I remember. I barely remember what I said to hubby.

I called him back and I just blurted (screamed) it out "I'M PREGNANT!!"

I have done this part before. It's the stuff later that I can't seem to do well. Friday I go for repeats, make sure that my betas are doubling at a fantabulous rate! Then I go back again the next friday, that's the one I worry about. Those numbers better blow everything away!

And, I think that I'm a basket case now?! UGH...